Second, Here is what I really wanted to blog about...I have been struggling for a long time with my husband's love for the military. This October, Luke and I have been together for 7 years. He never mentioned the military while we were dating. We both had a passion for Real Estate, not being a realtor but flipping homes (for you who dont know, flipping is finding an older or abandoned home needing updating/repairs and buying it and doing those updates and then selling it) We started college in 2005 and decided after 6 months to quit and pursue Flipping with my parents. After many months of trying to figure out how to go about getting the loans needed to do the job, the economy really started falling...The banks tightened up and we were basically told even though we had perfect credit, the banks just couldn't give us a loan for a property we were not going to live in. Luke got very upset about this and began to look at other options.
We were stuggling as a married couple because we were so young, we were both 19 when we got married...marriage is a hard thing sometimes and the job thing really effected Luke. He didnt tell me he was looking into the military, so I was blindsided when we split in 2006 (after 10 months of marriage) and he joined the Marines. We never divorced and after almost a month apart, he returned home to me, a US marine. I could talk and talk about this but I wont...I will just tell you by a miracle of God, he got out. He had not gone to Boot Camp and therefore wasnt fully committed. I was a complete wreck until the day we found out he was free to go.
Ever since that day, it has always been in the back of his mind of what would have been if he had stayed in the marines. Now with the economy being so bad, it is hard to find a job, and this has never been a problem for Luke, hes always worked for my family's companies. But he fears that my mom and dad will soon have to let him go, because people aren't buying the way they did before. He may be offered a job soon from a man at our church working for the military...he would not be in the army or military, he would just be working for them...in AFGANASTAN!! for a year!!!
Am I a bad wife for not wanting him to do it? Seriously, I really want yall's opinion and an honest one! I know alot of people follow my blog that dont have blogger accts, so you can message me on facebook. But I just hate the thought of him being gone in another country for a whole year!!! We have been married 5 years now and I just dont want to lose him! I am ready to start a family, not be missing him and be no where close to having children. He would still be in harms way everyday and to me it's not worth the money. But, this is why I'm blogging to get other wives and ladies opinions, no matter what it is, because I need to know what others would think if they were in my shoes.
I can just admit that I am not a strong person, I am very weak and emotional. I've been without Luke before and it was not pretty. I know that before when he left we were on bad terms, but that doesnt mean I wont feel the same pain, that may be why I resent the military, because it brings back so many painful memories...but I will admit that I am weak.
Thanks for taking the time to read this!
